Street value

A strange question crossed my mind. What street in the world boasts the most recreational drug use? I'm sure in the 1970s it was either Rockefeller Plaza or whatever street Aerosmith lived on, but times have changed. Today, there are still a few reasonable candidates: the Sunset Strip in Los Angeles, Broadway in New York City, Bourbon Street in New Orleans, Ocean Drive in Miami, 8 Mile in Detroit, and Las Vegas Boulevard 5 miles away immediately come to mind. (As would any street in Amsterdam, if I knew one.)

But my vote goes to an offbeat choice: Madison Avenue, the symbolic hub of all American advertising. What if those brainstorming sessions in the Fair Enough! campaign aren't too far off the mark? Certainly the person who created this Skittles commercial was smoking something. Taste the rainbow, indeed.


Then there are those bizarre Poser Mobile ads for T-Mobile cell phones, with a diverse team of individuals whose style might best be described as Flavor Flav meets B-Rad.


Memo to T-Mobile: the concept itself is weird enough, but for you it's inexplicable. After all, you pay Catherine Zeta Jones good money to be your spokesperson. Use her. I know I would.

Still don't believe me? I give you one word: Quizno's. (The preceding link is the British original. Its sounds and visuals, while theoretically work-safe, are still too frightening if you're alone in your cubicle. Someone thought those things would help sell food?)


Note: The above message neither recommends nor condones drug use, whether habitual or recreational. If you or someone you know has a problem, please seek assistance. I'm such a narc.

A topic-appropriate 55 Fiction Friday:

Let me tell you what I have seen. Young professionals ravaged by heroin in the prime of life. College kids who snort away their tuition. So-called artists reduced to potheads in the name of creativity. I know these people well. And you’ll never see me use that stuff.

That’s why drug dealing is my anti-drug.