Heatherettes

I have a theory. Say two movies are released the same weekend: one is the blockbuster movie for teenage guys, and another is the teen chick alternative. (There are no movies for adults in this scenario.) Chances are decent that I'll get to see a preview of the latter. So far I've seen She's the Man, Stick It, and Just My Luck.

Well, I can add John Tucker Must Die to the list. (An opportunity to see Miami Vice fell through, and I'm not paying money to see Colin Farrell stay greasy.) The title character (Jesse Metcalfe) has three girlfriends: head cheerleader Heather (Ashanti, maroon), social activist Beth (Sophia Bush, lavender), and overachiever Carrie (Arielle Kebbel, yellow). They are less than pleased to find out about each other, but then realize they've all been similarly played. Seeking revenge, they recruit and train Kate (Brittany Snow, olive) to be the fake girlfriend who destroys him.

The title is an exaggeration; the four girls only seek to kill John Tucker's reputation. That's probably for the best: the cast does fine here, but I don't think they'd be able to sell a Heathers-like dark comedy. Or Mean Girls, for that matter. That movie was so fetch.