Retail therapy

My family is a little like that woman in the Cotton commercial who goes shopping whenever something goes wrong. First, it's for things like losing her job or getting dumped, but then she extends it to things like breaking a nail or missing her subway stop.

I dislike shopping, and usually it dislikes me. But sometimes we're effortlessly drawn together. Take this weekend, where we decide to descend upon a department store selling cheap luggage sets -- my father suddenly discovers that he never again wants to carry a bag by its handle if he can just buy one that rolls instead -- and I find a pair of black leather Skechers casual/dressy shoes. Regular price: $64.99. I paid $6.75.

Yesterday I went back with my parents and picked up a nice black and silver 8x10 frame, a decorative swirl plate, and a ceramic mug. Total amount paid, with tax: $5.05. Yes, it's amazing how a magical combination of clearance items, introductory discounts, and shopping reward certificates can make life feel so good.

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Dyson, the most pretentious vacuum cleaner on the market.