Monday, December 18, 2006

Finally!

I've waited 32 years, but now Time magazine has named me its Person of the Year. I'll admit I lost heart in recent years, as the less worthy were recognized, like Dubya (twice!) and Bono.

I may be biased, but this was the right choice. More importantly, it's the right time. Am I the only one who noticed that I receive this honor in Brevity's first full year? Of course not; the staff of Time noticed.

Even beyond Brevity, I made great strides this year. I did not lose an election. I never once went negative in a campaign commercial. I've made no anti-Semitic remarks. None of my foibles have been recorded on video and uploaded to the Internet. And I wore underwear when I was out in public.

As a final note, yes, I would have preferred that the magazine actually included my name instead of being vague about it. I'll be sure to e-mail the editors and request a correction.

6 comments:

Janelle Renee said...

Congratulations on all fronts, most importantly a year of Brevity. (It's so underrated.)

Angry Pregnant Lawyer said...

"I've made no anti-Semitic remarks"

But did you call anyone "sugartits"?

K-Lyn said...

I was going to congratulate you...until that crack about Bono.

No sunglasses for you.

Neel Mehta said...

JR: Thank you. I strongly believe that a second full calendar year of Brevity will fetch me a Nobel Prize of some sort.

APL: Hard to say. I got arrested a lot, and I was drunk for all of November.

K-lyn: The things I have to say to get a rise out of you...

Butterflyfish said...

See I thought a better choice was the president of Iran.. ackmadenadenajad... ackmodonajed... eckmajenadude...

fuck it.

Brevity, you were definitely the better choice.

palmcop said...

It can't work as a matter of fact, that's what I suppose.