Short order crook

The sneak preview thing, while benevolent at times, is hardly a magic wand. The bigger the movie, the less likely I'll see it early. Sometimes I get lucky, but the key word is "sometimes."

This is my way of telling you not to get mad at me when I say that I attended an advance screening of Little Man Wednesday night. I suppose I had the option of not going, but then, who out there could warn you adequately? It's a service I provide, and I do it with pride. Well, maybe not pride, exactly. Humility.

An on-the-run diminutive thief (Marlon Wayans) poses as an infant left at the doorstep of a young couple (Shawn Wayans and Kerry Washington). Hijinks and lame jokes ensue.

Given the family pedigree (Keenen Ivory Wayans directs), I was reminded of "The Head Detective," a recurring sight gag sketch from In Living Color, where Damon Wayans plays a crimefighter without a body. The special effects are better this time, but the strangeness is the same.

This wasn't the worst film I've seen this year -- that would be Date Movie, which I saw on DVD -- but I found myself crossing my arms and shaking my head over scene after scene of wildly inappropriate content. The people in the audience who enjoyed the film the most were the ones who shouldn't be there: little kids. I sincerely hope they didn't understand most of what they found funny.

By the way, this is a photo of the exquisite Kerry Washington at the Los Angeles premiere. I didn't feel the need to subject you to some picture of Marlon Wayans in a diaper. I'm not that cruel.