Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Calling out Moby

The right column of this weblog lists people who also keep online journals. Some of them I know personally. Some I know only from cross-commenting. And among the rest are a handful of celebrities.

While maintaining a blog is not the most difficult thing in the world, it is time-consuming, so you have to reserve some admiration for any public figure who keeps at it. Sure, there are famous people who have their own website -- Jeff Bridges and Danica McKellar come to mind -- but they don't offer updates with any regularity. It requires greater commitment to unleash personal, unfiltered thoughts on a regular basis.

With that lengthy disclaimer, I've decided to call out Moby. (
I'm taking another stand! Last year I called out Duckie. I think this can become an annual thing.) I admit it: I have a beef with Moby. Well, not exactly a beef. It's really more of a tofu substitute.

So what's my protein mush-shaped problem? His writing is just... painful. (Okay, Rosie O'Donnell's online poetry is infinitely weirder, but Moby actually tries to make a point.) Between the pretentious use of lowercase letters and the consistently defeatist tone, I can't tell if he's trying to be e.e. cummings or Eeyore. Read a few entries and tell me you don't agree.

Moby, what gives? Maybe Eminem is right: you're too old, let go, it's over, nobody listens to techno...

Feel free to read more of his journal if you like, but I've taken the liberty of creating Moby's Ultimate Blog Entry by combining all the themes he touches upon repeatedly. Enjoy.

sorry for not writing last weekend. i was away. now i'm back home, in nyc.
but, alas, i have nothing to say.
far be it for me to blabber on endlessly about nothing in particular.
that's fox news' job.
maybe i'll dabble with the myspace account i set up last year.
does anyone still think this war is a good idea?
sometimes i get so upset that i feel like knocking over my plate of raw vegan food.

I don't mean to offend. No wait, I do. Maybe it's unfair to single out Moby; after all, we all have our boring qualities. Last winter I ate oatmeal every day. But -- and this is an important distinction -- I didn't keep writing about the experience.

Stay tuned. Next year, I'm calling out Potsie.


Quinn said...

You can't call out Potsie. That guy doing Potsie is unbelievable.

Neel Mehta said...

Nice. Fortunately, I'm only calling out the American Potsie. I hold the Italian Potsie in the highest regard.

Quinn said...


Mainline Mom said...

Ok um, I didn't actually read Moby's blog...but wtf do you expect?!

Neel Mehta said...

I guess I expected less repetition and more original thought. Maybe I should wait for the remix version of his blog with Gwen Stefani as a guest contributor.